New mama

A forum for Druid parents to discuss child-rearing issues and exchange ideas
Forum rules
If you find a topic of interest and want to continue the discussion then start a new topic under The Hearthfire with a similar name and add a link back to the topic you want to continue.
To copy a link just copy the url on the top left of your browser and then put in your post, highlight it and press the url button.
User avatar
SidheAingeal
OBOD Bard
Posts: 1213
Joined: 10 Apr 2004, 12:26
Gender: Female
Location: Canberra, Australia
Contact:

New mama

Postby SidheAingeal » 03 May 2010, 11:29

Hello all,

I used to hang around the OBOD boards A LOT. I was, you might say, part of the furniture. Suffice to say, I went on a hiatus and in the meantime, I had myself a little baby boy on Dcember 18, 2009. His name is Finn Aleister and he is the light of my life.

Has anyone else found the becoming a parent awakens all these different parts of your spirit you didn't know existed? Everything just seems more important now, somehow. Also, I'm more creative than I ever have bee, even with the late night feeds and teething.

Anyone else feel the same? Or was it the opposite for you?

Sidhe
Image
/|\ Sidhe

User avatar
White Star
OBOD Ovate
Posts: 228
Joined: 07 Apr 2009, 21:11
Gender: Male
Location: The land of the rainbow sky
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby White Star » 03 May 2010, 12:21

Belated congratulations to you and your baby son, a blessing upon the earth :hug: :cloud9:
Yes our children certainly did touch us spiritually and I bless the Goddess for them every day, mind you they also awoke our physical bodies too, at regular and most inconvienient hours as I remember, lol!
We are now grandparents and love our grandkids equally too, with the added bonus of handing them back when they become erm....inconvienient... :D ....Love 'm to bits really.
I wish you joy as a parent.

Bright Blessings.
"No one has any right to buy and sell the earth for private gain. By theft and murder, they steal the land; Now everywhere the walls rise up at their command." The Diggers c. 1649

User avatar
Argenta
Posts: 124
Joined: 28 Apr 2010, 07:10
Gender: Female
Location: On the (h)edge
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby Argenta » 03 May 2010, 12:48

Dear Sidhe,
first of all -- congratulations!

I'm a mother of two (aged 5 and almost 3), and having them has had unimaginable impact on my own spiritual path! I used to be a member of an Indian-based religion, but dropped out last year when I finally admitted to myself it wasn't for me. My kids were a huge incentive. I figured I couldn't belong to a group that didn't value family life (it was mostly about renouncing this world for the next), and the teachings of which were confusing to my children.

It made me reconsider so many things I used to take for granted, and began to value simple and common-sense solutions.The way I see it is now, if children can't grasp it, it's not worth doing. Perhaps that's a bit extreme, but it works for me. It is also why I decided to investigate pagan/earth-based spiritualities - I find these come natural to kids, plus they enjoy spending time in nature much more than in temples or churches with a thousand rules. My only problem is that, to my knowledge at least, there is no pagan community anywhere nearby, and kids crave for a wider circle of people who share their or their parent's worldview.

Unfortunately, with the two of them and a full-time job, I do not have as much time for my creative work as I would like to, but am learning to do it little by little. I do, however, feel that I have more energy (after I began to sleep all night long, that is :D ) and that, somehow, I manage to accomplish a great deal more than before.

Kids are great teachers, and learners, and I hope you have a fulfilling motherhood.
I am not young enough to know everything. (O.W.)

User avatar
Julysea
OBOD Ovate
Posts: 62
Joined: 10 Apr 2010, 08:31
Gender: Female
Location: Surrey, UK
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby Julysea » 03 May 2010, 19:31

I have 2 kids aged 7 and 5 and really found them to be a huge impetus to spirituality. I felt so amazingly connected to the earth and to every mother that has ever lived when I sat breast-feeding. It's not all ethereal sweetness though - they also challenge me on many levels and I have changed fundamentally as a result of being a mother. I've learned to really value the things that matter and leave aside the things which don't. I've also learned to value who I am, and who that is. And I'm much more confident now.

I've definitely found the children giving me a huge boot along my spiritual path.

User avatar
SidheAingeal
OBOD Bard
Posts: 1213
Joined: 10 Apr 2004, 12:26
Gender: Female
Location: Canberra, Australia
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby SidheAingeal » 09 May 2010, 12:10

Belated congratulations to you and your baby son, a blessing upon the earth :hug: :cloud9:
Yes our children certainly did touch us spiritually and I bless the Goddess for them every day, mind you they also awoke our physical bodies too, at regular and most inconvienient hours as I remember, lol!
We are now grandparents and love our grandkids equally too, with the added bonus of handing them back when they become erm....inconvienient... :D ....Love 'm to bits really.
I wish you joy as a parent.

Bright Blessings.
My boy still wakes me at weird and very inconvenient times, lol.
Image
/|\ Sidhe

User avatar
SidheAingeal
OBOD Bard
Posts: 1213
Joined: 10 Apr 2004, 12:26
Gender: Female
Location: Canberra, Australia
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby SidheAingeal » 09 May 2010, 12:14

Dear Sidhe,
first of all -- congratulations!

It made me reconsider so many things I used to take for granted, and began to value simple and common-sense solutions.The way I see it is now, if children can't grasp it, it's not worth doing. Perhaps that's a bit extreme, but it works for me. It is also why I decided to investigate pagan/earth-based spiritualities - I find these come natural to kids, plus they enjoy spending time in nature much more than in temples or churches with a thousand rules. My only problem is that, to my knowledge at least, there is no pagan community anywhere nearby, and kids crave for a wider circle of people who share their or their parent's worldview.
.
I definitely know what you mean about kids needing a wider circle. I do believe it takes a village to raise a child, and that includes their spiritual development. Kids want someone to relate to, someone they can compare themselves too.

I've reconsidered a lot since becoming a parent, too. I used to do WAY too much and I've really tried to simplify my life since my son was born. I used to be heavily involved in the local community but I've scaled back to my favourite and most important events only. I'd much rather be working on my own spirituality and devoting my energies to my family than spread myself as thin as I was.
Last edited by SidheAingeal on 09 May 2010, 12:29, edited 1 time in total.
Image
/|\ Sidhe

User avatar
SidheAingeal
OBOD Bard
Posts: 1213
Joined: 10 Apr 2004, 12:26
Gender: Female
Location: Canberra, Australia
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby SidheAingeal » 09 May 2010, 12:20

I felt so amazingly connected to the earth and to every mother that has ever lived when I sat breast-feeding.

And I'm much more confident now.
I wish so deeply that I could have breastfed. I had a lot of medical issues during my pregnancy and soon after the birth that made breastfeeding impossible. I've had to find that deep connection in other aspects of mothering.

I do feel more confident in completing tasks that used to daunt me. I am a little more assertive than I used to be and expect better treatment from others than I used to.
Image
/|\ Sidhe

User avatar
Argenta
Posts: 124
Joined: 28 Apr 2010, 07:10
Gender: Female
Location: On the (h)edge
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby Argenta » 09 May 2010, 12:45

I am a little more assertive than I used to be and expect better treatment from others than I used to.
I have a very dear friend who used to be very timid and always obliging. Now she says she has found a lioness in herself, and doesn't allow anyone to tell her any more what she should or shouldn't do.
As for myself, I do get better treatment than I used to. I mean, very few people would dare talk back to a mother, I discovered :-)

It's no wonder birth was considered a rite of passage for many of the ancient civilizations. It is so life-altering that very few experiences can be compared to it. As I see it, it is something that connects women more with their bodies, gives them an awareness and pride, and at the same time makes us aware that our bodies are not only our own, but something we inherited and have the obligation to give out to our children, with love and care.

There's a very beautiful prayer I found today on line, and wanted to share with you here, wishing you a Happy Mothers Day! :rose:

Remember always, your body is sacred ground.
Your roots are strong and the sun holy.
The gardeners who came before—
Mother, grandmother, great-grandmother—
Tilled your soil with the compost of their lives.

And now, you hold the seeds.
Plant them deeply in the furrow of this land.

May what comes to you as flower
One day ripe into fruit.
And in your final years,
May they return as shade.

by Lynn L. Caruso
I am not young enough to know everything. (O.W.)

User avatar
Tyriell_Whisperwind
OBOD Bard
Posts: 231
Joined: 04 Jan 2010, 02:57
Gender: Male
Location: New York USA
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby Tyriell_Whisperwind » 11 May 2010, 17:22

congradulations! :yay:
May Mother Nature Smile Upon You...
/|\ Tyriell Whisperwind /|\
:acornantlers: :wolf: :paw:

User avatar
SidheAingeal
OBOD Bard
Posts: 1213
Joined: 10 Apr 2004, 12:26
Gender: Female
Location: Canberra, Australia
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby SidheAingeal » 12 May 2010, 13:28

I am a little more assertive than I used to be and expect better treatment from others than I used to.
I have a very dear friend who used to be very timid and always obliging. Now she says she has found a lioness in herself, and doesn't allow anyone to tell her any more what she should or shouldn't do.
As for myself, I do get better treatment than I used to. I mean, very few people would dare talk back to a mother, I discovered :-)

It's no wonder birth was considered a rite of passage for many of the ancient civilizations. It is so life-altering that very few experiences can be compared to it. As I see it, it is something that connects women more with their bodies, gives them an awareness and pride, and at the same time makes us aware that our bodies are not only our own, but something we inherited and have the obligation to give out to our children, with love and care.

There's a very beautiful prayer I found today on line, and wanted to share with you here, wishing you a Happy Mothers Day! :rose:

Remember always, your body is sacred ground.
Your roots are strong and the sun holy.
The gardeners who came before—
Mother, grandmother, great-grandmother—
Tilled your soil with the compost of their lives.

And now, you hold the seeds.
Plant them deeply in the furrow of this land.

May what comes to you as flower
One day ripe into fruit.
And in your final years,
May they return as shade.

by Lynn L. Caruso
I must admit that when I'm standing there with a baby in my arms and a look of motherly sterness, no one dares to question me. I have noticed that on the rare occasions I go out without Finn, people do treat me with less respect. Not to say they are rude, but I'm treated as a young woman rather than as a mother and there is a difference.

Having kids certainly is a rite of passage! Just the physical strain of pregnancy alone is enough to change you, let alone the actual labour. Then you have the sleepless nights - nobody could hope not to change, body, mind and soul!

Finally, that poem is lovely. :) I hope you had a lovely Mother's Day! :love:
Image
/|\ Sidhe

Reyna
OBOD Bard
Posts: 222
Joined: 04 Feb 2008, 03:25
Gender: Female
Location: Oregon
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby Reyna » 08 Jun 2010, 17:57

Congratulations!!!

My daughter is 11 weeks old and she has completely changed my life. I used to be very laid-back, take-any-abuse type person and now I find myself being much more assertive and less likely to be walked on. I think its because there is now a little life that depends on me and if I put up with the BS then it effects her. I've also found myself so much happier with life and everything in it-there are still days when I've had no sleep or a shower and I'm just super grouchy but all she has to do is smile at me and I melt. It's the strangest combination of ultimate stress and perfect peace I've ever experienced and I wouldn't give it up for the world. She has made me find my center.
Let love drive you, guide you, burn in you.

saffronveil
Posts: 14
Joined: 19 Oct 2009, 18:45
Gender: Female
Contact:

Re: New mama

Postby saffronveil » 06 Jul 2010, 01:50

Has anyone else found the becoming a parent awakens all these different parts of your spirit you didn't know existed? Everything just seems more important now, somehow.
Absolutely. Pregnancy and birth were incredibly transformative for me. I came out of it as a different person than I did going in, and as others have said, it was a change that even complete strangers will acknowledge as you walk by with your child. I felt the connection with all mothers before me and all mothers in the world. I had an understanding of mothers and women that I simply did not have before. I had animosities toward women prior and felt a deep comraderie afterwards. Women would see me with my baby and smile knowingly, a look on their faces that said, "welcome." It was so odd to me, to have come through a rite of passage and see things so differently on the other side.

Things in my life changed priorities drastically. I realized some of the things that were insignificant and was able to easily put them aside. I was able to see bad habits more clearly, and I had the confidence, after giving birth, to go through the hard times that come with stopping bad habits. Things that didn't seem important before were suddenly incredibly so, and the simplicities in life were suddenly much more clearly what mattered.

I suddenly cared about other people to a depth I never had before. Not only in my family, but in the larger society, particularly for women and families going through this rite themselves, vulnerable to abuses and coercion and loss of empowerment during what can be the most empowering event of a woman's life. I thus became a doula and childbirth educator. The birth of my first child changed me spiritually and physically, but also changed my entire career path. I now help women through this rite and it is the most rewarding work I could ever do, despite the sacrifices and challenges of the work.

I was even made confident enough in my personal abilities, in my body and mind and spirit, to overcome an anxiety disorder completely, stopping medication and being given a clean bill of health in the mental dept. I attribute this to giving birth.

Pregnancy and birth changes us. Just as a new child is formative in their early developmental stages, so is the new mother (and new father). A new parent enters a new phase in their life, with a hugely obvious marker of their transition into this phase. It is an intensely spiritual journey.

Congratulations and welcome to parenthood. ^_^

-Christina


Return to “Druid Parenting”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest